For my first 8 months in Toronto, I lived with some friends in the upper two floors of a house in “Little Portugal” (near Dufferin station). It was a great place, we didn’t have access to the yard, but we did have an awesome balcony with a nice view. We also had another squirrel invader. At the back of the house, there was an un-insulated “cold-room” on the second floor. Outside, there was a hole in the side of the house, in which this particular squirrel decided to nest. At first, we just heard the scratching (which drove the cat nuts). Then, one day, the squirrel started to come through:

At first it didn’t seem so bad. We figured it would hear us (and smell the cat), realize it was coming through the ceiling into scary human-land, and stop digging. At least, that was the story I told my roommate, because she was slightly paranoid about waking up one morning and finding a rabid squirrel loose in the house. (I have to admit, I did start locking my bedroom door closed - just in case…). But this squirrel wasn’t going to be deterred by a vicious, hungry cat, and things quickly escalated:

At first, the landlord figured a few strips of packing tape would do the trick. I tried to point out that this was an inferior approach, and duct tape would be far more effective. But in the end, no tape-based solution was going to keep that squirrel out. We were forced to abandon the cold-room and retreat back to the kitchen, barricading the door at all times (except when we had to get stuff out of the refrigerator). Although guilt was felt (by some), we requested an exterminator. The landlord was a bit squeamish about that, though, so instead she just had the hole patched over. The squirrel lost it’s nest and probably froze to death. And the cycle of life continues…

Toronto has lots of weird public service advertisements, like this one I saw on a full-size billboard in the subway (below-left). Maybe it’s only been since the SARS thing, but there seems to be a general paranoia about GERMS. Every bathroom at the university has signs explaining secret hand-washing techniques that will prevent you from leaving behind any GERMS. Secret techniques like “wiping down everything you might have touched with a huge wad of paper towel”. (I guess when it comes to GERMS vs Environment, GERMS win). I would not be surprised to learn that there is a number you can call if you accidentally contaminate something with your GERMS, to have a biohazard clean-up team dispatched immediately. Although, I guess Alberta does have the rat patrol. I wonder what weird neuroses other provinces have.

Also, fighting meats:

Finally, just in case you are ever having some trouble classifying different types of wood, the IKEA in Etobicoke has your back:

According to my computer machine, there are over 3000 pictures in my My Pictures folder. And I’ve hardly shown you any of them. So, it’s your lucky day. Sort of. Today we explore Montreal.

If you ever move to Montreal, one of the things you will get used to is the bizarre, incomprehensible workings of the City Works department. There are projects all over downtown that the city seems to have just forgotten about. You never actually see anyone working at these sites. They’ve they just thrown down some boards and moved on to digging the next hole. One of the local newspapers even stealthily followed a City Works crew around for a day. The crew ran errands all morning and hit the strip joints in the afternoon. Oh, and they spent about an hour filling a pothole. This dedication to a job well-done explains why, when you look down most of the holes on St Laurent, you see something like this:

Yes, those are your phone, cable, and electricity lines, suspended from metal tubing with a random system of rope and tape. This is what holds Montreal together. It’s unclear if the city ever comes back to fill these holes, or if they just wait for Montrealers to fill them in with cigarette butts…

This is a tiny hamburger, from a tiny restaurant called Patati Patata. You might consider it a snack, but for fashionable Montrealers, it is dinner.

During the winter, we made the mistake of only closing the inner window in our bathroom. Humidity from the shower froze the window shut, and a huge ice block built up that lasted until spring. During this time, a squirrel built a winter nest in the gap between the inner and outer panes. Imagine waking up after a late night, groggily stumbling into the shower in the morning, turning on the water, and having your squirrel buddy freak out inside a window just inches from your head. Woke me up pretty quick, anyway…

Montreal has some really great billboard advertisements. Maybe it’s because the culture is a bit more liberal, and, well, cultural. Unfortunately I don’t have pictures of any of those, so here is one that makes me wince, and one that AC thought was hilarious. She even found a postcard-sized version of the….um….”finger” puppet, which can be cut out and worn. (Thankfully, the card is still intact)

Finally, an action shot of the ballsiest (and/or batshit-craziest) motorized wheelchair guy I have ever seen. You can’t tell from the picture, but this is essentially a highway, with traffic moving at about 80 km/hr. I was walking towards the underpass one day and I heard honking, honking like it was going out of style. And then I sew the man in the chair. His little orange flag, waving proudly. And Montreal drivers careening around him, honking and screaming like the maniacs that they are. The man in the chair was unfazed by the situation. Perhaps even unaware. All I could do was stop and watch the spectacle. Crazy wheelchair man, I salute you…

Check back soon for more blurry, over-exposed pictures, brought to you by Motorola…